Happy New Year!!

Another Year is coming...seems like just yesterday, that it was Y2K...and the fears that the world would explode. Can't believe it's gonna be 2007!!
2006 was a good year, but I have decided that 2007 is going to be even better. (DIVORCE - yay!).

Hope you all have a FUN New Year. As for me, I'll be right where I belong. Right where I am happiest. See you in 2007!

I'm all alone for once...

I haven't been alone in this house since November. That was the last time Steve took the kids for a weekend. Today he picked them up for 5 days. It's nothing short of a miracle. I am pleased to have this time to myself to relax and clear my head. Tomorrow I go to D's to spend some 'alone' time with him...and ring in the New Year together. I can hardly wait for tomorrow to finish...so I can be on my way.

So what did I do, you ask? I came home from work, stripped down to my underwear, and snuggled up on the sofa with a warm fuzzy blanket, had a nap, phoned my boyfriend, watched some television and updated this blog. I should be sleeping shortly. HA! I get time alone and all I want to do is sleep. It is nice not being required though...for once. "Mom get this, Mom get that!" I'll miss them though...likely. (hehehe - or not). ahhhh...they know I love them immensely.

To prove it, I'm posting these two pics of us...acting silly. These turned out not too bad. Love my new digital camera. Allison has asked for a scrapbook for her birthday, so I must start taking a crap load of pictures this weekend and surprise her with something special!

P.S. I watched the Family Movie we made Mom and Dad, again...only this time I was alone. You were right Stella...it friggin makes you cry! Awesome work!

Christmas was awesome!

When everyone started arriving Sunday night, i was literally exhausted. We had a blast though!

Dennis came and insisted I open my present the minute he walked in the door. He got me a digital camera! I was ecstatic. :-) I LOVE THAT CAMERA!!! I love him too!

Christmas morning, was great. Kids loved their crap i got them. Dennis loved his scrapbook and couple of other things we got him, but it was so nice to have him here on Christmas morning. :-) Kids liked that too.
We went out to his sisters' for Christmas lunch and we said hi to everyone, then we hurried it up to Dennis' place to have our third christmas! You will see the pic I posted of the GRIDDLE he bought me...the way he wrapped it was awesome. UNIQUE and very DENNIS style. Sweet.

Boxing Day...not sure what today is for, but it was sure fun for me. Dennis and I spent the whole day cuddling, and snuggling on the couch, watching Sopranos (Season 2). Now I'm back home, and getting ready to go to work tomorrow. THAT SUCKS!

Here's a preview of Christmas...loads of pics uploaded on msn space. :-)
Love you's all...hope you all had a wonderful Christmas!!

Christmas Trees and stockings

Thought while I was at it, I'd post some cell phone camera pics of my two trees and our huge stockings. Not very clear...need a better camera.

Christmas Flowers

I got the most gorgeous christmas centrepiece delivered to my house last night, from work. These pictures don't do them any justice, but all I had was my cell phone camera. (Hope I get a digital camera for christmas). Hehehe..

These are gorgeous!

CHRISTMAS is coming!

I can't believe Christmas snuck up on us like this...so quickly! I have so much baking, cooking and cleaning to do before Christmas Eve. I'm really looking forward to having a bunch of people here to visit. We don't usually have company, so it'll be nice! People have been asking me what I want for Christmas but no one can really give me what I truly want. A divorce! It's been a year of lawyers and crap and still not settled. How truly annoying.

All i want is a divorce. I want to spend Christmas with Dennis and my kids and relax for a few days and forget about all the stressful things in my life. Failing that...yeah, a cozy new fluffy pair of pyjamas will do the trick. HA!

Money helps too. K...off to find a spot on my bed to lie down on and crash for the night. OMG...did I say I have lots of cleaning to do...starting with my bedroom. (Groan).

Before I do that...I am posting a christmas picture of Kayla and Jory...which I love. :-)

Bragbook Scrapbook

I made Steve a Bragbook that the kids could give him for Christmas. I thought for them, it would be something a little more personal than a box of chocolates, although he really don't even deserve those. (I'm so tired of being nice).

Anyways...the scrapbook took me one whole evening...5 hours to be exact. I did such a good job i had to scan it, so I'd have memories of it. LOL. So I also made a movie. :-) Check this out!

My Darling Guitar Genius

This was Cynical Limit Live at the Kim Mitchel Concert a couple years ago. You rock hard Babe...great guitar solo! ;)

Me and Kayla.

Since i posted one of Jory, thought today I'd post a picture of Kayla. This was taken when she was about 2 or 3 months old.

Pregnant...no, not now!

Sandra L, this one is for you. It's one of my very first scrapbooked pages. You can tell...it's on an 8x10 paper. Anyways...it's a page of me pregnant with my first one...Kayla. YIKES! Oh...happy times. I remember how happy I was.

More remembering.

Ahhhh...if life were that peaceful anymore.
Jory just a few days old. What a dollface.

This is the cutest picture

Was looking thru albums...and this struck me as the most innocent childhood wonder. Jacqueline and Jonathon, you guys were too cute.

Jacqueline: "Is it real?"
Jonathon: "I dunno...touch it."
Jacqueline: "Eh?? Should I?"
Jonathon: "What the heck, why not?!"
Jacqueline: "Okay...ummmmmmmmmmmm...OMG!!!!!!!!! IT's PLASTIC!!!"
Jonathon: "EH?!!! You're kidding!"
Jacqueline: "Good...auntie Sandra won't kill us now!"

HAHAHA....too cute!

Happy Birthday Gordie!

Made this for you for your birthday! My gift to you... :-)
With love and thanks from Diane and Jacqueline...my little photographers! :-)
xoxo

Me and my Daddy

This was taken at Jacqueline's Graduation. Awwwwwwwwwwwww...I love this picture!!

Blah, blah, blah...

The forms from the Family Responsibility Office (Ministry of Social Services) finally arrived in the mail today. I have a dozen papers to fill out. Can you believe it, they actually asked me to attach a recent photo of the guy and ask all kinds of odd questions, like his credit card #'s, licence # etc., I don't know half of this stuff. What a pain in the behind! Oh well...at least it's a sure fire way of getting the payments, if he tries to default.

So there was a car accident in front of the house the other day and the pole that houses the phone and cable wires was ripped out of the ground, along with my mailbox. We had no means of communication last night. They came this morning and spliced my connection with the neighbours...so at least I can come on here tonight.

Going to D's house this weekend with the kids.
It's been a long week for all of us. I'm looking forward to finally 'soul talking' with my sweetheart. I miss him so and am so proud of him this week, more than others. He is my God Send.

Can't wait till Erin moves in! Looking for a job...if anyone knows of any openings, let me know! (Degree in Social Work). Me and the kids worked hard all week cleaning out her room and we set up the video games in Kayla's room. It looks cool! Anyways...going off to bed now. So tired. Night' all. Luv ya's.

Leavin' ya with this little project i worked on the other night...

Sleepyhead

This was me this morning. I forgot to set my alarm and woke up half an hour late. I managed to shower and put on my pretty face in half an hour and still be ready in time. Makes me wonder why I waste so much time those other mornings...I COULD BE SLEEPING IN! ;) (hehe)

Just Us

Thank God for us. :-)
We had a fun weekend. The kids were pretty upset that their dad wouldn't come get this weekend, but we showed them a good weekend in spite of it. D, was awesome and ultimately supportive. We always make the best of things. He surprised the kids with some fireworks, which we let off Saturday night. Jory and Kayla were thrilled to hold the Roman Candles and shoot them off near the road. I think all the neighbours heard, as we saw the lights flicker on shortly after the first firework went off. It was quite funny. Kayla and Dennis played on the DS and she showed him how to abbreviate for MSN. You know, "TTYL" means talk to you later...etc., What a hoot! We learned a few things. HA!

Looks like it's gonna be a bit of a bumpy road ahead. Like I said, we'll make the most of a bad situation. On the other front, looks like if we can settle this 'visitation' issue, everything else is settled and we can finally sign the seperation agreement and get divorced. It's only been 3.5 years... (rolls eyes).

I heard this quote last night on "Extreme Home Makeover"..."There's alot to think about, but nothing to worry about." I shall hold faith to that. That and the fact that I have God on my side. He's never left me through all of this. "Strength and Honour"...It's in our favour.

More later.

You're so cuddly...I wuvvvvvvvvvvv you.

Awwwwwwwwwwwwwww...when I saw this it absolutely 100% reminded me of me and Dennis. :-)

Happy Birthday Daddy!

Mom and Dad, I know you read my blog often, so thought I'd send you this very special birthday wish.

Dad, you have always been the Greatest Dad ever. I love that you have vast amounts of wisdom and that you have such a caring and gentle heart. My fondest of memories growing up as a child, and ones that I think of often are of you coming home from work, and me jumping up on you to squeeze your belly and take off your workboots. I loved snuggling with you on the couch. I also miss making you tea. :-) Those are just little things though. I will always cherish how you have always been there for me and your love and support throughout the years. I love you ever so much. Have a wonderful day! xo

Since I met you

Since I Met You
(author unknown)

I rise each day and wear a smile
With thoughts of you there all the while

And even though we’re miles apart
You’re always living in my heart

The days that pass are just a test
Reminding me that you’re the best

I’ve never felt this way before
Each day I love you even more

It’s all becoming very clear
I know one day that you’ll be near

A change from I and you to we
For you and I were meant to be

Just another birthday, but oh so sweet...

Jory's been sick with a cough. Drove out to the clinic tonight, and can you believe it, they turned us away?!! Sorry, we're not taking any more patients...we are full. GRRR...so I went to the drugstore and bought cough medicine - against my better judgement. We'll see if it makes any improvement.
I have sinus congestions...these friggin allergies. Bought some Reactine. It's pretty nasty today.

Mrs. C came over just now and brought me a birthday gift. A gorgeous wicker basket with christmas stuff in it. What a wonderful idea...to get ready for the christmas party. Candles, candy, napkins, and all kinds of goodies. I can barely wait to try out the foot soak basket. THANK YOU!

Allison made me this beautiful birthday card, which I treasure along with all the things my own children have made for me over the years. (I will always love you too baby girl!) Dennis...your card sits high on my fireplace...it ain't ever coming down. (It's very special.)

Okay...enough for now...gonna go make some tea. I've been drinking alot of the herbal stuff lately...green teas and stuff.

My Birthday

It's been a fun day so far. :-)
I would rather not be 36, but it's been a pretty cool day.

I got the most awesome balloon from Brenda, and the rest of the gang up there...there couldn't have been a more perfect balloon. When you whack it, it sings, "WILD THING"...there's a blonde on the front of it with long hair with a big smile. :-) All of those little gifts the girls sent me (You guys are hillarious!)...anyways, they made me laugh for sure. I almost forgot the CHOCOLATE FUDGE cake - B, you are awesome!

Then...i got back from lunch and there flowers from the guys here at work. Awwwwwwww...the most beautiful roses. White, pink and red. How sweet.

Going to ESM for dinner tonight. Although, I'm thinking I'd rather just stay home...I got a headache, from all the attention today. HA!

Trick or Treating

We went to Rob and Sarah's with the boys on Halloween night. Kayla and Jory dressed up and we did the neighbourhood rounds in the community. The weather was perfect and the kids got loads and loads of candy. Jory broke the handle on his bag, it was so heavy. I'm sure they will never eat all of it! Afterwards, Kayla and Cam, sat on the front porch and handed out candy to the few trick or treaters that were left. Rob and Sarah's house looked awesome! Way to go guys!

Kayla was dressed as a bat/spider girl...she looked awesome! We did her eye makeup real dark...lots of black eyeliner, and black eyeshadow and glitter. She wore a black wig with streaks of orange in it and a black toque with braids. Her hair looks pretty sweet in black!!

Jory was dressed up like a vampire. (or something). He was Vampire Sr., and Liam was Vampire Jr...looked like Elvis. HAHA! I didn't have any batteries in my camera but i got these with my cell phone camera. They aren't too bad. Sarah will send me more pics when she gets a chance, and I'll post the lot of them later!

FUN FUN FUN! NO Regrets. :-)

Winter is coming...

Ahhhh...Saturday, rain all day. Sunday it was so freakin' windy! We woke up at Dennis' with no power. Wondered how I'd ever make my coffee and just when my migraine started to get out of hand, the power went back on and I was able to get my coffee. (hehehe)...can you say 'addicted to caffeine?"
I absolutely felt like this all weekend, being treated like a princess by my luv'r. I love you babe. Absolutely every time I see you, you confirm that absolutely no one but you could ever make me this happy. :-)



Sarah, your spaghetti was great. I tried your recipe...loved it!
Friday night I watched "The Lakehouse" with Sarah. I love that movie. GREAT CHICK FLICK! ;)

I have decided that I am going to skip my birthday this year. I don't wanna be 36. :-(

Hopefully soon...

Tuesday I reviewed my offer for final settlement on this dang divorce case. I am hoping the 'other side' takes the offer so I can finally put this crap behind me. I feel good about it. :-)

It's been a long week so far. Work is hectic.

Kids are doing well in school. In fact, Kayla got 96% on her Geography test. She was so excited, as she should be. As i stood in the bathroom this morning, helping her put on her black mascara, i was remembered when she was just a wee one, and I would brushing cheerios out of her hair. (She had nasty morning hair - ha! the back would fuzz up in a big ball, it was so fine.) She was such a doll.

Jory too. He was just a pudge. I could squeeze his legs for hours and rub his fat little arms and nibble his chubby toes. How I often wish, they were little again. (Well...okay just for a minute...cuz i like that they are more independent now! - ha!)

Lost is good eh? Poor Sawyer got quite the beatings last nite. It was nasty. And they went and changed the time for "THE NINE". I can't stay up past ten. Grrrr!

Ahhhhh

...Had a great weekend! I woke up early on Saturday morning, (7:30) even though I had intended on sleeping in till 10 or so. I suppose it didn't help that i fell asleep on the sofa watching Viva La Bam with Jory at 8:30 at night. I was so exhausted.

Friday afternoon was Brian's last day at the office. I am a bit bummed about that, because I'll miss him. Not sure how it's going to affect me, other than I'll have a heck of alot more work to do until they find his replacement.

My weekend visit with Dennis was so nice. I was so happy to be with him. We went to Steve and Pam's house on Saturday night for roast beef dinner (holy, best roast beef I've ever had!). They have this adorable Shiloh Sheppard (puppy), but he's HUGE. He was gorgeous. And she had these twin cats, that had white boots on. They were so cuddly. I love Dennis' new curtains in the living room...i want some for my dining room. :-)

Sunday morning, we got up at 11:00. Woke up to snow. Didn't really get any accumulation but there was snow. It ended up being a nice cozy day on the couch watching movies with the warm fuzzy blanket!

David came to visit last night. That was so nice. Kids told me when he left, how nice it was to see him. YOU look GREAT David! Too bad Sandy didn't come, cuz i wanted to see her belly! I'm looking forward to Christmas for the first time in a while. Hoping to get everyone together at my place for lots of 'eats' and 'goodies'. :-) A Candlelight Christmas Eve...sounds nice!

Anyways, should get to work. I got a million and 3 things to do. (GROAN).
Still waiting on that raise. (Double Groan).

Here's a pic of the type of dog we saw this weekend...so gorgeous.

TGIF

I'm so glad the weekend is almost here. Just one more day slaving away here at the office and I get to sleep in tomorrow. I'm so tired!
These two pictures just about tell it all. :-)

Have a great weekend guys!

What is wrong with kids these days?

Bullies leave disabled teen for dead in fire.

I read this article this morning and sat here with tears going down my cheeks. I have a cousin with spina bifida and he is one of the most cheerful kids I have ever met. What is wrong with kids these days? They have no respect or concern for human life other than themselves?

So i read in the article, the kids were let off with strong warnings from the police. What ever happened to making the parents accountable for their children's behaviour? This world is really '*'ed' up.

Man it's getting cold out...

Can't believe there was thick frost on my windshield this morning. I am not looking forward to winter. I friggin' hate this cold weather. I don't even have my fall boots yet!! It's my annual tradition, but i haven't had the chance to get them yet.

The kids and I hung out this weekend. We cleaned, grocery shopped, and watched movies. We ordered chinese take out on Saturday night...with enough food to last for two dinners! Jory and I snuggled on the couch and watched "While You Were Out" on Sunday morning. It's friggin freezing in my house...Jory's little feet were like icicles up against my legs. That little bugger kept rubbing them up against me just to make me laugh.

Same old...nothing majorly exciting. I love hanging out with my kids though. That was fun guys!

Getting to know you thingie.

GIRLIE TIME!!! I got this from Laurie this morning, and thought I'd blog it. Why the heck not? hehe!

1. FIRST NAME? Sandra

2. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? I have no idea... (mom, dad, was i?)

3. WHEN DID YOU LAST CRY? About two weeks ago, when I felt 'suckered' into making a decision I didn't want to make. I cried because I'm too nice and I wish I could be tougher sometimes. (I hate it when people take advantage of my good nature).

4. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? It is becoming more and more messy the older I get, but when I take my time, I think it's kind of fluffy and cute. YA.

5. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE LUNCHMEAT? I love bologna (i know it's gross)...but it's one of those comfort foods.

6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? Oh why of course! I'm soooooooo nice.

7. DO YOU HAVE A JOURNAL? Yes. I have more than one.

8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS? Yes.

9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? Never!

11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF? I don't have tie up shoes...just running shoes. AND NO i do not tie them or untie them. I hate laces.

12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG? Not always. I think I am generous, and thoughtful and usually think of other's before I think about myself and I think it's one of my weaknesses. But then again, some people would find this attractive. I suffer for it sometimes. I do think I can take more than I think I can. I wish I would speak up for myslf more - I guess I'm not that confident about myself.

13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE ICE CREAM FLAVOUR? Vanilla. (I love to throw chocolate chips on it).

14. SHOE SIZE? 7.5 (Flinstone Feet - I don't like them much)

15. RED OR PINK? Red - Deep Red. Pink is for girls. Red is for women. :-)

16. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVOURITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF? I need to lose weight. I am not happy with my body at the moment.

17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST? Dennis - always.

18. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING? Blue Jeans and brown heels/slip ons.

19. LAST THING YOU ATE? Cadbury's chocolate fingers.

20. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? The Radio. Some Gay song...that's what you get for listening to Majic 100.

21. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? Silver, or Brown...maybe Burnt Orange.

22. FAVOURITE SMELL? Dennis' natural smell. (We call 'em phermones.

23. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? Guy - My lawyer

24. THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE YOU ARE ATTRACTED TO? Eyes and then hands

25. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU? Friggin Right - Laurie is my home girl!

26. FAVOURITE DRINK? Spumante Bambino Wine or Rye and Ginger

27. FAVOURITE SPORT? I hate sports - but the only one I sort of enjoy is Hockey.

28. EYE COLOR? blue

29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? No

30. FAVOURITE FOOD? Salmon, anything with garlic, and pasta

31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? Happy endings

32. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING? brown sweater

33. SUMMER OR WINTER? Fall....fall...fall (the forgotten season!)

34. HUGS OR KISSES? I like both.

35. FAVOURITE DESSERT? chocolate

36. WHAT BOOKS ARE YOU READING? Toxic Relief/Dr. Colbert; The DaVinci Code/Dan Brown

37. WHAT'S ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? my hand and my black mouse. (hehe...my mouse pad is blue)

38. WHAT DID YOU WATCH LAST NIGHT ON TV? The Nine

39. FAVOURITE SOUNDS? Dennis playing acoustic guitar, and NOTHING...absolutely nothing.

40. THE FURTHEST YOU'VE BEEN FROM HOME? I don't know!

41. WHAT'S YOUR SPECIAL TALENT? I can cook, clean and bake and I am creative. I am good at decorating too.

42. AND WHERE WERE YOU BORN? Leominister, Mass. USA

43. WHO SENT THIS TO YOU? Laurie

The Weekend was....

We had our turkey dinner on Sunday night. I love cooking for D. Have I mentioned that I really like my man? :-) Love is one thing, but I really like him! "FFS..." ;) ha!

Hey Brenda and Diane...glad you guys went to Stella's...I was gonna call you Saturday night to find out if you had somewhere to go, or else you could have hung out with me and Dennis. I figured you guys would go to Stella's. :-)

Just giving you's all the heads up...Christmas Eve is at my house this year...D, is spending the night with me and the kids...PARTY!!! The whole family is invited! Christmas Eve is on a Sunday night this year, so that works out perfectly! I'll have all of Saturday and Sunday to bake and cook and clean and get ready! Can't wait! I have the kids this year.... yeeha! K, i better get to work. Talk all laters. Love ya's.

P.S. Mom and Dad...i love you guys. I will call you tonight. I got your letter and gift in the mail. What a blessing! :-) xo

What I'm thankful for

We were watching CSI last night, focusing on the coroner stitching up a deceased body, and we sat there wondering why this woman on the table had a red beanie cap on her head, then we realized it wasn't a hat, it was her scalp peeled back onto her face. I almost puked. HA! Man, we friggin' laughed for like a half hour. I guess maybe you had to be there. Strange episode last night. Disappointing.

Kids have their first PD day today. Kayla was up before I left - I told her to get back to bed, but she wanted to grab the computer before Jory got up. Typical. Hehehe.

So...it's Thanksgiving this weekend. Couldn't help but remember how much I love this time of year. So much I decided to get married 15 years ago yesterday. That's right, I'm still officially/legally married, so i celebrated my 15th wedding anniversary yesterday. 3 years on my own...and although at the beginning of my 'loneness' i would have cried the whole day, I sat and thought about how much I just didn't care about him. I didn't think I'd ever get to a point where I'd not be sad that I was almost divorced, but I thought about that day I officially will be and I smiled. I wish it would hurry up. We're almost there. Lawyers are working on the final stages...HURRY IT UP!

I thought of all the things I am grateful for last night, as I lay in bed praying my heart out. Prayed for my kids - thankful they are both healthy (spirit, mind and body) and thankful that they recognize I am their ROCK. Thank you God for my kids.

Thankful for my home. Even though I don't like the circumstance around it, I am thankful that God blesses me with it, and that I can afford it. I am thankful for the 'other' family recognizing that I need 'their' help to make it through. I am thankful to be alive. 3 years ago...I spent many nights wanting to leave this world, and am thankful that I didn't. :-)

Thankful for my family. My mom and dad and sisters/brother who love me and care about me. I am thankful for my neices and nephews and thankful that I will yet again, be an aunt to another little one in April. Thank you God that she/he will be healthy and will be a blessing to our family.

And of course, I am so thankful for Dennis. At a time i felt that NO one could relate to me, that no one could understand me, know me and I had no one to share my soul with, he came along. The past two years I have felt like I finally had the other part of me that I had been looking for all of my life. I can share my deepest thoughts and feelings with D, and know that I am understood, accepted and loved. It is the most amazing feeling knowing that someone out there loves you just the way you are, faults and everything.

I am thankful for all the things that are yet to come. I am mostly thankful that in spite of all my shortcomings and failures, God still takes care of me and loves me enough to let me love these people back.



HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!

Been a while...

It's been a while since I posted, so thought I'd give a quick update. Ain't much to tell...it's been the same old routine that it has been since school started. I get up in the morning, take out the trash, sweep the kitchen floor, make a pot of coffee...go to work...sit at my desk for 8 hours staring at the monitor and punching in #'s, then i go home make supper, clean house, do laundry, make lunches, help kids with homework, make tea...crash on sofa around 8, fall asleep...get up and go to bed.

Fun eh? It's so friggin' exciting I can hardly stand it.
In a twisted sort of way though, my routine gives me comfort. At least I have my kids and a roof over my head and I have a job so I can feed them. Some things you simply can't help but be grateful for, even though there ain't much joy in the routine.

I'm having an off 'sleep' week. It goes in patterns. Some weeks i sleep really well, and other weeks, real crappy. Well this week is a crappy one. Can't fall asleep and even though I eventually do I can't seem to stay asleep. I wake up feeling like a zombie. GET ME SOME MORE SLEEP! I had a migraine yesterday from about noon until i went to bed. I still have a slight ache this morning, but it ain't nearly as bad. Maybe if I take some tylenol now it will curb the escalation. Who knows.

Lost is on tonight...season premiere! Been waiting all summer...the kids can hardly wait. Should be a good one.

I browse Post Secret every Sunday...this is the one that I liked.



I'll make sure I buy a couple of lottery tickets this week.
When you feel like you got no hope, it kills ya...
i'm sort of there...
no hope...
no life...
and who really gives a ***k. (Because everyone else has problems of their own...who has time to care about someone elses's?)

/i dunno

A Baby!

Congratulations DAVID and SANDY! I can't believe the news! I can hardly wait to be an auntie again. I'm so happy for you guys. :-)

Optimist Creed

Promise Yourself

Promise yourself to be so strong that nothing can
disturb your peace of mind.
To talk health, happiness, and prosperity to
every person you meet.
To make all your friends feel like there is
something in them.
To look at the sunny side of everything and make your
optimism come true.
To think only of the best, to work only for the best,
and expect only the best.
To be just as enthusiastic about the success of others
as you are about your own.
To forget the mistakes of the past and press on the
greater achievements of the future.
To wear a cheerful countenance at all times and give
every living person you meet a smile.
To give so much time to the improvement of yourself
that you have no time to criticize others.
To be too large for worry, too noble for anger, and too
strong for fear, and to happy to permit the
presence of trouble.

The Optimist Creed

Heroes

You guys watch the Series Premiere of Heroes? Man...what a great show! Finally...got something to watch on Monday nights. LOL!

Despite it all

Despite It All
*author unknown

Despite the place
That I'm now in,
This corner of my life
That tells where I've been...

Despite the set backs
That I face,
Or of the tears
That leave a trace...

Despite the time
That distance brings,
Or life's little quirks
And all other things...

Despite that fact
That I still live,
Memories of a past
I can't forgive...

Despite the rains
That flood the trail,
Despite life's winds
A force of gale...

Despite the moon
Lay hidden behind,
The tracks of time
Within my mind...

Despite harsh words
Whispered allowed,
Or of the sun
Behind the clouds...

Despite the way
Life comes about,
My love for you
There is no doubt...

For no force is greater
Then how I feel,
No wall strong enough
To conceal...

No time or distance
Will ever end,
My love for you
transcends.

----------------------
tran·scend (trn-snd)
v. tran·scend·ed, tran·scend·ing, tran·scends
v. tr.
To pass beyond the limits of: emotions that transcend understanding.
To be greater than, as in intensity or power; surpass: love that transcends infatuation. See Synonyms at excel.
To exist above and independent of (material experience or the universe): “One never can see the thing in itself, because the mind does not transcend phenomena” (Hilaire Belloc).

v. intr.
To be transcendent; excel.

Unloading...

I finished off a pretty uneventful weekend with a bang. Friday night, i cried sobbed myself to sleep, pretty much feeling like yet again, "I'm the sucker". There just ain't no choice when it comes to the kids. You do what you gotta do. I've faced the fact that I have more debt than I can handle at the moment, and I lay in bed praying I'd win the lottery and be able to unload this stress from my life. In all fairness...at least now i am one step closer to my divorce. I wonder what my lawyer will think about the choice I have made? Oh well....this postcard says it all. It's a testimony of how I feel today.



Onward, I say. How could it get much worse?

Tickle Me Elmo Part 2

The new toy for Christmas 2006. Cute.

CSI Was Awesome

CSI last night was cool! What a cliffhanger at the end of the show. Katherine doing the self investigative rape kit thing. To be continued...

Survivor this time round is a little more interesting, but still dying a slow death in my books. Only cuz there's nothing else on to watch. That crazy oriental man should win, he's hillarious. Billy, the heavy metal musician, who got voted off last night, what a psycho..."She loves me!" hahahaha....

Heard Three Days' Grace is coming to Ottawa, November 14th at the Civic Centre...Kayla and Jory will want to go to that! So will Mommy. :-)

ACK!

I got a freakin' cold! This sucks. It's sucks to be me today.

2 Year Anniversary

Today we celebrate 2 years together. Babe, you're my rock and soft place. I love you dearly! xo

Cutest Kid Ever

This kid is munchable....arrrrrrrrr...so friggin' cute.

Apple Picking

We went apple picking at the orchard on Sunday with Sarah and the boys. What a hoot! The Macintosh apples are absolutely delicious! The kids spent an hour in the corn maze, while Sarah and I stood in the hour plus long line up to get apple donuts. Worth the wait (dunno), but they sure were good! Nice and hot!

Jory has come down with a cold...poor little fella, feels like crap. I've got a bit of the sniffles but not nearly as bad as he does.

Sarah...send me those digitals you took...i'll post them here. When i get my roll developed i'll send them to you. (Yeah, I still use ancient photography). *Hopefully get a digital camera for christmas (i'll buy it for myself). {hehehehe}

Going apple picking reminded me of 'our' date two years ago...tomorrow...(anniversary)...it was sweet! "Wanna play with my apples?" LOL!

What's up?

Just got back from a visit at Sarah's. So nice to catch up. I missed ma girl! We watched Miss Congeniality 2 - friggin' hillarious. I loved it. I don't get why D don't like her (Sandra Bullock)...she's hillarious in that movie.

So Bell came tonight and fixed my phone. He fixed some wires on the pole and fixed the ground wire into the house. He said the wires were ancient...no friggin wonder. Anyways...he did a bit of snipping in the basement to the wires, some twisting and we're all as good as new. I am able to plug in my dozens of cordless phones now...and actually hear the phone ring...ha! Internet is working too! w00t!

So...tomorrow we shop for groceries, run a few errands and pick up a few items needed for school and then we watch CSI all night. Sunday, we are going to the apple orchard with Sarah and the boys. Hey...that's where me and D had a date, with the kids...i remember so well. Hell, i even kept the email he sent me after the date...first time he called me a 'peach'. Sweet memories.

It's our two year anniversary next Tuesday. xo

Lukas wins Supernova

Now all this....I didn't know. Those are some pretty impressive gigs he's had...including Big Wreck....mmmmmmmm...and working with those producers...
Too bad Dilana didn't win, i'd been cheering for her from the beginning. Lukas was my second pick....seems that always my second pick ALWAYS wins these damn reality tv shows. Hope that doesn't say anything about me...HAHA!

Lukas Rossi

Jeff Buckley meets Freddie Mercury? Though you probably never thought you'd hear such a unique merging, this is exactly how mega evocative, ultra versatile and vocally gifted singer songwriter Lukas Rossi has been described.

The distinction has served him well during his 15 years in the world of music. Lukas has recorded, written, produced and played with his own band, the incredibly popular Cleavage, as well as co-written, sung and gigged with various Canadian bands, including Papa Roach, I Mother, Tea Party, Edwin and Big Wreck. He also took on the impressive opportunity of working with producer and Rush guitarist Alex Lifeson, as well as and Jay and John Levine from the Philosopher Kings and Prozac.

You would think that would be enough for any rocker on the rise, but not for Lukas. Proving to be a natural talent as well as a hard worker, after acquiring a publishing deal with EMI Music Canada in 2004, Lukas worked and wrote with producer Dave Tyson (Alana Miles & Amanda Marshall) in Los Angeles. After that, he recorded demos with producer Gavin Brown (Billy Talent, Three Days Grace), leading to the formation of the band Rise Electric.

His own personal work, tenacious talent, able contributions and general musical know-how have served Lukas well and, as such, he has elicited the attention of both fans and major label interest. From that, he's had several showcases in New York City for Atlantic Records and Arista.

But with Lukas, there's always more. A notable, soulful standout all his own, Lukas also contributes vocal work for television and radio, singing on national ad campaigns (including McDonald's) and even animated cartoons during which he sings the intro song to the shows "Rescue Heroes" and "Beyblade."
Phew! That's a lot of work. And respect. Lukas' credentials, experience and finally, magnetism make for a performer as exceptional as he sounds.

Our phone is dead

Yeah...we had an electrical storm on Friday evening and this huge lightning bolt hit right near our house. (Scared the bejeebies out of us). So now we have this extraordinary amount of static on our phone line, making it non-functional. So i call Bell, and they can't come out till next Thursday (how freaking crazy is that??? I got no phone and they can't come until Thursday??). If you'll be trying to call us, you'll have to call on my cell #. Also...we don't have internet...

I got fed up with them. This happens every friggin' time we have a storm. SO......I called Rogers and amalgamated ALL my communication services with them. On the 20th, we will have new phone service, Rogers Cable Internet (i'll have a new email address) and bundled all our other services. Can you friggin' believe it...I'm gonna save myself $70.00 a month!!!

Why didn't I do this a long time ago??
Our phone # will be the same! Yay...I've only had it for like 18 years...It'd be weird having a new one. HA!
/over and out.....

Remembering 9/11

Unconditional Love

Unconditional Love
by BigDawg

A treasure to be cherished
A gift from God above
Is the beauty of a woman
Touched by unconditional love

A love that asks no questions
Believes in all the best
Never doubting, ever trusting
Withstanding any test

A love that weathers any storm
And yet that love that stands
Reaches out through
That darkest hour
It still lends a hand

There in that hand
The sweetest gift
That you can give a woman
A heart that cares
A love that shares
That will be there till the end

A treasure to be cherished
A gift from god above
Is what I share with you my love
An unconditional love

The cutest kittens on earth

Kayla and Jory this one is for you. You gotta check out the kittens on this webpage: (Cuteoverload - Kittens)

Birthday Dinner

We went to Swiss Chalet with Grandma and Grandpa tonight...to celebrate Kayla's Birthday. Kayla's really into Bobby Jack at the moment, so she was thrilled to get her new Bobby Jack watch, hoodie, t-shirts and bathrobe. She will also look great in her new jeans! Grandma and Grandpa are awesome! :-)

Here's a picture I clumsily took of Kayla when they brought her the cake...and sang HB to her...so cute. Jory is in the background there... :-)

K...off to get homework finishes, lunches made and showers! BUSY, BUSY!

We made it through the first day of school!

I really don't know who was more nervous: me or Kayla.

I rushed home at 3:00 to sit in the parking lot of where Kayla would be dropped off the city bus. The bus was there just as I arrived. This semester she is taking Gym, Geography, Math and French. (In that order). She was so busy trying to find her classes, she hasn't discovered where her locker is yet. Then after school, she has to rush out of class and shuffle her butt to catch the bus. It comes shortly after school finishes.

Jory did well too. He has a brand new teacher this year, whom he says is nice. His french teacher is cranky (not his words)...haha...and we are looking forward to a nice fresh year!

Last night, I signed forms and agendas, made lunches, and we sat down as a family at the dinner table...i made the dinner, kids cleaned up and did dishes. Kayla had 3 hours worth of math homework. Gonna be a busy year.

Steph...hope your first day of high school was good too!!

My workspace after a long weekend

So friggin unbelievably busy after a long weekend (here at the office). I believe this is the largest pile of time sheets (driver's reports) that I have ever seen on my desk. Ever.

Groan. It's the first day of school and I can't keep my mind off Kayla...wondering how she's doing on her first day of high school...



P.S. Can barely move today...every muscle in my body is aching.

I'm exhausted

Spent the whole weekend cleaning the house, and organizing. Every night I'd climb into bed, body aching and back feeling like it was broken in half. I made brownies, did about 15 loads of laundry, washed and scrubbed floors, scrubbed bathroom tiles, shopped, washed curtains and got rid of about 5 bags of crap from the kids' bedrooms. It was like spring cleaning, in the fall!

Kayla's birthday was on Saturday. We spent the day cleaning. Poor Kayla. I made her a gourmet breakfast...french toast, with whipped cream, topped with fresh berries, and for dinner we had her favorite: salmon, rice and brocolli. For desert we had angel food cake. Not a typical birthday party, but at least we were together. Kayla has decided that she'll wait for her birthday present till September 18th, because that's when Pokemon DS new game comes out in stores...and that's what she wants.

Can't believe how nervous I am the night before my baby girl goes off to high school. I logged on to the computer to print out our emergency phone # lists...to stick in their backpacks. I've put everything in there...tylenol, cell phones, emergency telephone quarters (In case battery on cell phone is dead) and some emergency cash for lunches, incase they forget theirs at home. Hope I didn't forget anything. LOL! I'm manic! LOL! I guess that's all part of being a mom. I had been thinking of going into work late tomorrow to see Kayla and Jory off to school, but I've decided that they will be fine with gramma and grampa seeing them off. I shall remind Kayla to phone me on her lunch hour...just to check in!

Hope she remembers where to ring the bell when the bus drops her off at home. EEK! I'll have to remind her when I get off.

Having said that...it's time to go make their lunches. Ahhh...the school routine has begun. :-)

Daddy Shrinks

I could not believe how different my daddy looked when I saw him yesterday (Brenda and Diane moved into a new place). Anyways...no more belly. I'm so proud of you daddy. Take a look at how much belt is hanging off your waist there! WOW!

Herbal Magic rocks eh?!

Dollmaker

Me and Kayla are having fun with this.
Addicted.

Kisses

Left Feeshe: I love you.
Right Feeshe: I love you more.
Left Feeshe: No, I love you more.
Right Feeshe: NO I LOVE YOU MORE
Left Feeshe: I LOVE YOU MORE DAMMIT [underwater screaming]

Gosh darn it...as i finish this blog...all i can smell is putrid skunk...this is awful!!!! I think sprayed right outside my computer room window. (GRRRR!)

Thanks

I just wanted to thank you all for your prayers and well wishes. I appreciate it very much. The day went well. There are still a couple of items to be discussed and a few tweaks to our agreement, before it's all final, but we are moving ahead, and that for me is progress. A couple of issues got settled, which is a big improvement.

God is just and I'm going to keep believing that he provides Justice to the Righteous. He is good. :-)

Dyed My Hair BROWN

Oh the things we do. I dyed my hair brown. That way I won't look like a dumb ass blonde. HA! It actually looks really nice on me. My face don't look so 'washed out'.

Blonde just screams fake, fake, fake! (Ya, i had a purpose doing this the night before I go to court). :-) Besides I was tired of it. This will work for a while, until I get bored of it too. :-)

Another Weekend gone...

My weekend was nice. Saturday, the weather was gorgeous, it was a beautiful drive out west to see Dennis. There's something so relaxing about that drive. It is as if I am leaving my 'problems' behind me and running into the arms of my 'knight and shining armour'. Every need is taken care of for 2 days. It is my time of soaking in and 'filling up'. I guess that is why I found this 'daily poem' quite reflective, when i opened up my email today.

New Beginnings
by Dean Wiedmann

Rhyming words, disappear
Empty feelings, it is clear
Words of love, they must stay
Understood, its our way

Bump in the road, a helping hand
On the right path, love lands
Honest thoughts, welcome ear
Nothing secret, nothing to fear

Granted love, absence peaks
A subtle cry, lovers speak
Magnetic minds, come together
Touch each other, now and forever

New beginnings, old traditions
Mending hearts, new additions
An old song, a brand new tune
A new season, time to bloom

God is just. I have been ever so seeing more and more these days and believing that 'you really do reap what you sow'. I covet your prayers for tomorrow. I deserve justice. One cannot continue to treat another human being as if they were worthless and without a conscience and not have some negative inheritance from it. I pray that the righteousness of God, shines through. It'll be my day.

It is time to:

Feeling romantic today...

....in your arms, everything just fits.

Shudd up and gib me a hug....

Awwwwwwwww....hugs are nice!